Comparison is Today's Thief
Take your convictions from God and His Spirit, not your friend who seems to be slaying it or social media influencers. Stop comparing. Stop scrolling. And look around YOU, because those are the people that matter most. They need YOU at your worst and best.
I was able to catch up with two friends yesterday. In both conversations, comparison came up. I am so guilty of this. Scrolling and comparing the squares I see on Instagram and FB to what my life looks like. Comparing what I should do (sleep train, don’t hold the baby too much, date nights, friendships, make sure you put yourself first, don’t give too much, blah, blah, blah).
I’m the first to admit, my house and life look a lot messier than the squares that roam up and down my screen. And there was a period when I would look at these people, who let’s be real, I barely knew, and pin myself against them. Guess what? I’d lose every time, and I’d close my apps and think: I have got to get it together. I’m ruining my family. I’m not as good as ______ (fill in the blank). I need to _____. I’d try what they were doing, and it would stick for a day or a few - maybe a couple of weeks, and then it wouldn’t. Why? Because it didn’t work for our family. Those weren’t MY people, and they didn’t need that specific system or thing. Then, naturally, I would beat myself up over the failure.
And then, God slapped me with a message (like He usually does): STOP. STAY IN YOUR LANE. Stop comparing yourself to others (Galatians 6:4-5).
No one on your feed or in your life lives the same circumstances you live. No one has the same personality dynamics in their family. No one has the same financial situation or work schedules. And no one has the same home structure. When we pin ourselves against what we see on social media, we are losing the gifts that we’ve been giving to steward. Your people are your people. Only YOU can love them the way they need loved. You know them best!
Plus, we are only seeing what’s in front of a camera. Highly likely - staged, beautiful, and one of the best parts of someone else's day. We don’t see what’s behind it. We don’t see the sacrifice made to get that picture, video, reel, etc. We don’t see how they feel about themselves and where they feel like they’re failing. We don’t see if they yelled right before the picture or post, if they're happy, if they cooked dinner or ordered out, if they have help, or if they have a heaping pile of laundry or a mountain of unmatched socks. You get my gist. The Pharisees looked like they had it all together, and we know that wasn’t true.
So take the message God is STILL teaching me: stop comparing yourself and love your people the way they need loved. It’s a mixed bag. Some days, you may feel like a failure. Like you yelled too much. Like you need to be better. There is always room for improvement. Let us remember: God’s mercies are NEW each day (Lamentations 3:22-23). So lean into that. Take your convictions from God and His Spirit, not your friend who seems to be slaying it or social media influencers. Stop comparing. It's a thief and it steals, kills, and destroys (John 10:10). Stop scrolling, and look around YOU, because those are the people that matter most. They need YOU at your worst and best.
“But each person should examine his own work, and then he will have a reason for boasting in himself alone, and not in respect to someone else. For each person will have to carry his own load.” Galatians 6:4-5 HCSB
“I, Yahweh, examine the mind, I test the heart to give to each according to his way, according to what his actions deserve.” Jeremiah 17:10 HCSB
“Because of the Lord’s faithful love we do not perish, for His mercies never end. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness." Lamentations 3:22-23 HCSB
"A thief comes only to steal and to kill and to destroy. I have come so that they may have life and have it in abundance." John 10:10 HCSB
“Just as you don’t know the path of the wind, or how bones develop in the womb of a pregnant woman, so you don’t know the work of God who makes everything. In the morning sow your seed, and at evening do not let your hand rest, because you don’t know which will succeed, whether one or the other, or if both of them will be equally good.” Ecclesiastes 11:5-6 HCSB